Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
