ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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