I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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