Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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