Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
