Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
