Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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