At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Randomize
