I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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