You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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