just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
