i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I looked at my own cervix.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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