you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
