Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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