that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
