Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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