The maid of honor just puked.
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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