ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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