I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize