Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
