apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize
