how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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