also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
