I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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