I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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