she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Randomize