Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
