the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
