i think i have herpe
just one?
My pussy is not your playground.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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