i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
whose ass print is on the piano?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
