just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
