Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
