ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
