Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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