He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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