Michael Bay diarrhea
I got her a Nickelback box set.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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