omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize
