The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Randomize
