Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
