i think my mom watched the whole time
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
