Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize