I want to make a zoo with you.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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