I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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