guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
