I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
