i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Randomize
