So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize
