so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
