i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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