Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Randomize
