i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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