Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
