grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
